How Would They PPC?

It's a question of the ages: if Plato were a PPC, how would he go about it? Plato wrote a universe of works on different topics--many lifetimes have been spent only deep-diving into his works and nothing more (although not recently)--but today we will focus on one of his ideas: the Allegory of the Cave.

Machiavelli, oh, Niccolò! The man whose reputation has been defamed in successive centuries since he wrote. A more cynical person might suspect he was defamed on purpose precisely because The Powers That Be wouldn't want anyone to know how effective a guidebook of his rules could be. But no, not I; I'd never suspect such a thing!

Ah, Wittgenstein, Wittgenstein, a man who was deeply controversial in his day, with the "genius or madman"--a fraud, fake, or a friggin' phenomenal genius forever?--debate still raging now, heading on a century later; indeed, in this "Who would they PPC?" series, he will probably be the single most controversial philosopher I'll dive into.

Yes, yes, yes, I know you've been up at night wondering, "If Max Weber were alive and got a job running Google Ad campaigns, how would he go about it?" and--alas!--the answer is here for you.

A question for the ages: If Friedrich Nietzsche were a PPC, how would he PPC? Nietzsche himself probably paced the halls of the University of Basel wondering, if an all-encompassing knowledge machine existed and he was tasked with ensuring that normies using the all-encompassing knowledge machine would see the results that he (or his patrons?) wants them to see... how would he go about doing so?

With someone as thoughtful and quietly influential as Popper, the pressing question on everyone's mind is: how would he have run a Google Ads/AdWords campaign if he were a PPC?

Yes, this question has occupied the best thinkers in the world for a century and a half, and I will try to shed some new light on it. If Immanuel Kant were to run a Google AdWords or other PPC campaign, how would he run it?

Thomas Hobbes (whose dark world view argued for the brutality of the world around us and the necessity of civilization) would have been quite a PPC manager running a Google Ads account. I would hire him. Plato's too-perfect-in-theory campaigns would probably collapse under the weight of reality, Wittgenstein would probably spend all his time trying to understand how the platform works. But Thomas Hobbes is someone whose world view would map to an awesomely successful account.

The burning question of, "If Aristotle were an online marketer doing PPC & SEM running Google Adwords campaigns, what strategies would he use?" is a question almost as pressing as wondering the same for Seneca.

How, I know what question has been haunting you for the last seconds, days, or perhaps years? "If Seneca were a PPC, what sort of AdWords PPC strategy would he follow?" Yes--stop the presses!--I know this is the question to end all questions on which the future of the world hangs!